Children need more than “don’t tell strangers.” Whether information is appropriate to share depends on the person, purpose and situation. Teach a way to pause and seek help without making children ashamed when they have already shared something.
Compare situations, not just lists of forbidden facts
A personal information activity can compare telling a school office an address with posting that address in a public game chat. The detail is the same; the context and purpose differ. Discuss names, location, passwords, images and information about other people using age-appropriate examples.
When teaching social skills, distinguish private and personal information from secrets that prevent help. A child can always tell a trusted adult about threats, unwanted contact or anything that makes them feel unsafe.
Practice a pause and a response to mistakes
Rehearse “I need to check before I share that” and how to contact an agreed adult. Adults should also provide appropriate supervision and privacy settings; responsibility cannot rest entirely on the child remembering a rule.
If information has been shared, respond calmly and take practical protective action appropriate to the situation. Avoid removing access to support as a punishment for disclosure. Review what made the request confusing and what would make the next decision easier.
A simple practice example
Compare two requests: a known school staff member checking an address through the school’s normal process, and a player in an online game asking where the child lives. Practice pausing, not sharing immediately and checking with the agreed adult. The child does not need to determine whether the requester is dangerous before seeking help.
Explain that telling a trusted adult about unwanted contact, threats or harm is always allowed. A rule about privacy must never become a rule to keep an unsafe secret.
Sharing student information appropriately
Choosing realistic discussion scenarios
Further reading: Federal Trade Commission: protecting kids online
Sources and further reading
- Relationship Skills — CASEL
- Resources for Teens — StopBullying.gov
- What to Do If Your Child Is Bullying — Child Mind Institute
- Frenemies and Toxic Friendships — Raising Children Network
- Sharing and Learning to Share — Raising Children Network
